I know Partner and Parent have EXACTLY the same letters in them – but guess what?
They are not interchangeable….
I once read a quote from Quincy Jones – musical genius -and it addressed just what I am talking about…
“I know now that no other woman can take the place of a man’s mother, and that no man can take the place of a woman’s father.”
So many people fall into this place where they are in a relationship expecting their partner to somehow leave off where Mom or Dad left off – Now, for those who might feel that our parents somehow missed a beat, there might be a tendency to seek out partners that fill that void.
NEWSFLASH people it ain’t gonna happen! For one, if we are broken and searching for love in that spirit, we will find the people that mirror our broken-ness. It is unfair to expect anyone to fill another person’s shoes especially if it is an “idealized” image we hold in our heads.
Until we find another way to take care of that needy child inside – we all ALWAYS feel let down when that partner fails to deliver what we “expect.”
So, today – if you’re feeling frustrated or disappointed with your relationship (married or single) check yourself and make sure your expectations are realistic. Accept your partner for who THEY are and take note of what makes them unique as your partner NOT your parent…..and most importantly, no one can read your palm or your heart – so talk about what you’re feeling